Friday, August 20, 2010


There I go, that's absolutely the wrong question to ask.

Flirting is a delicate art. Like the art of making the fluffiest and lightest pastry or cupcake or gelatto, flirting requires a light hand. Make that a light heart. And a glad eye. And a lightly raised eyebrow. And the lightest, most coquettish fluttering of eyelashes. Accomplished flirts can flit - like butterflies - from here to there, bestowing a smile, a wink, a flattering comparison, a risque compliment, even a suggestive proposition. All this without getting enmeshed or entangled in anything heavy or sordid like a relationship. Flirting is like those 100% fat-free gelattos, they are frothy, dainty, gossamer, and 100% commitment-free.

Flirting is the art of the indirect.

Unfortunately, I am a rather direct sort of person. A bumblebee who blunders straight into trees, rather than a butterfly.

If somebody pays me a compliment, I always wonder, "Really?" and often say aloud, "Why?". I raise my eyebrows rather than flutter my eyelashes.

Maybe because of my contact lenses, it is easier to raise eyebrows than it is to flutter eyelashes. Whatever, I am really really heavy-handed and get all hot and bothered by any kind of flirtatious contact.

Which is a pity, because flirting can make your life really easy. You can jump queues, get small favours done, get the best products on offer, get extra discounts, get better service, get away with late-coming/bunking/shirking-work/not-meeting-deadlines/making-1001-mistakes/murder. Anything, actually.

Flirts can pirouette and escape the consequences of their inaction. Whereas blunderbusses like me have to prove myself with every action.

So, let me be direct, and ask you, "Can you flirt?"

Because, to my ever-lasting regret, I CAN NOT.


Anonymous said...

flirting-Two way path it is I guess.
And Yep if it is two way I can.

manju said...

What an enjoyable post, Sucharita!

Though I can understand that life would be easier if you could flirt-perhaps one has to be born with that ability? Or can it be cultivated? :)

Swaram said...

Nt too sure I can ;)

magiceye said...

love your writing! brilliant!!
not complimenting flirtatiously ;)

Ugich Konitari said...

I just read both your posts, on winking and raising eyebrows (delicately) . I actually just tried both.

Amazingly, I have to say, that I can only use both eyelids together and/or both eyebrows together. :=_

While one may be called a blink, I wonder what is implied when you raise both eyebrows together ...

Purba said...

I react exactly the same way, when someone compliments me. Act flustered and invariably forget to say thank you.

Me, I can just crack smart ass jokes.

SG said...

Flirting is a social interaction whereby one person indicates interest in another person. But you should be aware of the following:

1. Hands off – Don’t touch the other person
2. Don’t be nervous
3. Don’t try to show you are very smart
4. Don’t try to laugh at everything
5. Be confident. But don’t be over confident

Do I sound like an experienced person in this?

Babli said...

Thanks a lot for your sweet and lovely comment.
Very nice and interesting post. I enjoyed a lot reading it and liked it very much. Very well written.

The Solitary Writer said...

hey well written for sure...nd as u said flirting is an art

hmm i can flirt :D shameless me :D :P

Onkar said...

Now that we know the benefits of flirting, we may try our hands at it.

sujata said...

I cannot ever be a butterfly, I am more like an elephant! But I admire flirts too, with a grudge!

Nancy Yos said...

Strangely enough, I think I can. The key is: "looking up at a man as if he knew more than God almighty." It worked for Scarlett O'Hara.

Pinku said...

yes...and it is fun.. :)

cultivate it as a hobby and see what powers you can use and misuse ;)

Sayani said...

Well i don't think am expert in that ...but really i would like to get coached :P

Funny and message delivered :)


The Writing Instinct said...

In this age of botox I am not sure how those who want to flirt (but look expressionless) will be able to do it. I wonder what other flirtatious avenues they will seek?

Great post!

Pradip Biswas said...

in our times this was known as buttering. Everybody likes it,even people saying 'do not try to butter me" was frustrated if you took his/her words seriously. In our profession before climbing we grease the rope a little.

Shahid Mukadam a.k.a Shady West Side said...

I dont think i can flirt either ...btw there are ppl giving good tips here on ur comments section...someones already making notes!!

Arundhati said...

Very well written. I don't think I can flirt, what I do is rib, but I think one must ask the other party concerned!

Babli said...

Wish you a Happy Rakshabandhan.

Susmita Biswas said...

I feel it is a sweet coated bitter pill and to be applied under prescription of self intuition only.

Nona said...

This looks like a "How To" on flirting as you have described it well. :)

Tomz said...

Don't worry..
Here is one more person sharing the same regret

Sudeshna Hazra said...

Yes, I flirt. Somehow when the going gets tough even just within me, it helps to liberate the fresh winged pupae. Its a way of learning about the world and its people. Like any craft, it depends on the craftsman, to what use, he'd like to put that to ;)
Your narrative- very well compiled talks of some of its ill uses ;)