WHY WOMEN DRESS-UP

I was writing a kite-flying post for my other blog, Past Continuous, where I mentioned the manja - the sharp paste containing powdered glass that is coated onto kite-strings to give bite and edge to cut the strings of competing kites.
In Bengali, when a girl dresses up in all her finery, people (especially older male relations) often comment in jest, "khub manja merechhis toh!" (You've put on a lot of manja).
Presumably, it means that adornment (dress, make-up, et al) is like a weapon with which the woman arms herself (like the kite's weapon is the glass-edged string). If life is a battle of sexes, then it is only logical to step out armed with a suitable weapon.
For whom, though? To cut other kites, or females, out of the competition? And, is there an underlying assumption that women are like playthings in the hands of men, and they can pull us along like kites? Ahem, ahem!!
But the manja is a double-edged thing. It can cut other kite-strings...and also cut the palms of the inexpert string-puller. So, men beware!!! If you persist with making inoffensive but double-meaning comments to prettily-dressed members of the opposite gender, remember that your palms may get badly slashed, especially across the heartline.

DREAMS OF DISTURBIA

The Copy-kitten (my younger daughter) sleeps uneasily, groping for contact, tossing her head, mumbling in her sleep. Sometimes she dreams of conflicts and protests aloud confusedly, in a variety of languages. The first dream I recall was one where she cried out, “Maithili maarti hai” (Maithili is hitting me), Maithili being her best-friend-who-can-and-often-does-turn-into-worst-enemy. Often she sits up in her sleep, crying “aamaro chai” (I also want) …some indeterminate, indecipherable object, or “amio korbo/ jaabo” (I’ll also do/go)…again something or somewhere which we cannot fathom. A hug and a soothing hand are usually enough to calm her down, but on rare occasions her phantom-struggles break into loud and long-drawn sobs that refuse to be pacified easily.

Her entire life revolves round the expression "amio", “ME, TOO”. Her aim in life (awake or asleep) is to grow up double-quick and become as old as her sister (the Lil Cat) and do the things that everybody else does. Even in her dreams she is in a hurry to catch up with the others, maybe that is why her sleep is full of unrest.

Being a younger sibling must be a competitive kind of an experience sometimes (NOT all the time, obviously). My elder daughter, timid and rather shy when awake, sleeps in peace and dreams with a smile. The younger one, spunky, confident and cheerful (if rather stubborn) when awake, has fractious and contentious issues in her dreams, battling imaginary demons, fighting to create her own space, even in sleep.

On her third birthday, apart from the millions of things that mothers usually wish their child to have, I pray for her to enjoy the bliss of calm sleep, full of soothing dreams, every single night, as much as I pray for her to have happy, busy, days.